ARENAS SUSPENDED INDEFINITELY!

Agent Zero, turn in your badge.

Gilbert Arenas, the sharpshooting Wizards (ironically, formerly known as the Bullets) guard has been suspended indefinitely by the NBA.

Indefinitely. Not a game, not a month, not even a year. Indefinitely. That means until NBA Commissioner David Stern feels like it.

Arenas' suspension stems from allegations that he and teammate Javaris Crittenton pulled out guns on each other in the Wizards locker room. This has led into a federal investigation as well as a possibility that the Wizards void Arenas' gigantic contract.

This means even more trouble for the already troubled Wizards, who have been severely underachieving in a very weak Eastern Conference.

But if the Wizards start winning games without Arenas, then we can safely say that the "Allen Iverson Effect"* is in full force.

*The Allen Iverson Effect is addition by subtraction, meaning a team becomes better because a player has been removed. Think of it as like a cancerous tumor being removed from the body.

MAN CRUSH GONE WILD.

Every basketball fan has had a man crush on a particular player. For most, it revolves around players named Michael Jordan, Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, Kobe Bryant or Lebron James (or Sonny Jaworski, Alvin Patrimonio, Johnny Abbarientos or Benji Paras).

To those interested, my man crushes are Scottie Pippen and Nelson Asaytono, plus Gabe Norwood.

But there is a limit to man crushes...and this guy definitely crossed the line.

MORE PICS FROM THE AGENT ZERO PRESS CON

Arenas signing a shirt.





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THE AGENT ZERO PRESS CON

Sometimes, I really love my various jobs...

Last Saturday, I had the unique opportunity to watch Gilbert Arenas, the man I lambasted a few columns ago, talk in front of a rabid Pinoy media.

And I was pleasantly surprised by the warmth, charm and humility of the man.

Okay, so I still don't think he's worth 127Million over 6 years (or 111Million, for that matter). But you do have to be amazed at a man who turns down 16Million with the words "What can I give my family with 127M that i can't give with 111M?"

So I think it's say to say that Gilbert Arenas, the person, has scored some major points with me. Gilbert Arenas, the basketball player, can do the same if he leads the Wizards to an NBA title this season.

AGENT ZERO GETS HOW MUCH?

125-127 Million over 6 years?

Are you freaking crazy?

For a guy so crazy, he's had his home remodeled to simulate higher altitude? (for more efficient oxygen consumption, I think)

For a guy so petulant, he sabotaged his chances of ever making the US Men's Olympic Team by berating and blasting more sterling stars like LBJ and Melo, then denigrating lesser stars like Kirk Hinrich and Joe Johnson (remember his "I can't believe they even considered them" line?), and finishing off by threatening to score 50 points on the teams coached by the Olympic coaches?

A guy so eccentric that he threw an "intimate" club party for 3000 of his closest friends and grunts "hibache" every time he shoots?

A player who plays only one end of the court, who is not known to make other players better, who is never mentioned in the MVP race?

I guess this is why I'm not the Wizards' GM. Coz I just can't figure it out.